Scroll Bandit

Calling Out The Web.
Sharing What Works.

Scroll Bandit breaks down the web, from design and code to marketing and culture, showing what’s broken and how to fix it.

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A smartphone wrapped in a yellow tape measure labeled “100vh,” symbolizing viewport height issues on mobile.

True Full-Height Heroes on Mobile (No JS)

Fix broken 100vh on mobile. Use svh and dvh for full-height heroes that actually fit every screen.

A distorted webpage bending as a popup appears, showing how modals cause layout shift.

Stop Modal Jank – No More Page Jump

Stop modal layout jump with one line of CSS. Keep overlays clean and steady without JavaScript.

A cartoon mechanic measuring and adjusting giant A and B letters inside a workshop, representing font metric fixes.

No CLS from Web Fonts – Size Adjust to the Rescue

Stop layout shift from web fonts. Match font metrics with size-adjust for perfect text and zero CLS.

People in a museum admire “The Original Interface” behind glass, labeled “Do Not Touch” - Parody of tech worshipping old designs it once broke.

The Feature That Didn’t Need Fixing

Not every redesign is progress. Some features worked fine before someone decided to “improve” them. Leave working stuff the fuck…

A tired person holds a smiling mask covered in social media icons. A satire on fake online personas and personal branding.

Everyone’s a Brand Now

The web turned people into products. Everyone’s building a “personal brand” instead of just being good at something. Maybe it’s…

Cartoon of a vintage computer proudly sitting on a stone pedestal with the screen text “Still works. U mad?” surrounded by smoking, broken modern gadgets. A satirical take on old tech outlasting new “smart” devices.

Old Tech, Still Winning

Old tech still works better than half the “next-gen” nonsense. From plain CSS to USB sticks. Proof that simple still…

Businesspeople kneeling before a glowing statue labeled “Algorithm,” symbolizing blind faith in social media and search platforms.

Is Digital Marketing Hard? The Brutal Truths No One Admits

Is digital marketing hard? You’re not imagining it. The web’s drowning in fake experts, bloated tools, and burnout. Here are…

Cartoon staff name badge with multiple URLs like /page.html, /index, and ?id=123 crossed out, and a taped-on label showing the correct canonical /page.

Canonical Chaos: Why Your Site is Fighting Itself

Canonical tag SEO done wrong = duplicate content, lost rankings, and Google picking the wrong page. Here’s how to spot…

Flat illustration of a vending machine churning out digital links, representing automated link building.

Automated Link Building Explained: The Complete SEO Guide

Learn what automated link building is, how it works, and the best tools and strategies to scale your SEO campaigns.

Cartoon computer screen showing Gmail Inbox Zero, engulfed in flames and smoke - a parody of productivity culture.

Inbox Zero, Burnout 100.

Inbox Zero promises productivity bliss, yet the email-cleaning cult fuels burnout. See why chasing an empty inbox wastes hours.

Spam, but handcrafted sometimes. resource
Spam, but handcrafted sometimes.

Not polished, not even regular. Just stray thoughts shoved into an email because that's what you do on the internet.